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Mentally disabled man stays independent with a little help from his friends

Editor's note: The Time is Now to Help was founded by a local businessman who knew extreme poverty as a child. With the help of donations from the community, The Time is Now is able to help local residents in need.

Dear W.C.,

I am asking for help for my dear friend. He is mentally disabled and is really struggling to get by. He lived with his mother until she abandoned him. He told me many things about his upbringing that I was shocked to hear. I have nothing nice to say about his mother or her terrible treatment of her son.

He is able to work, and does have a part-time job. He does not earn enough to pay for food, rent and utilities. I bring him food whenever I can, but I am struggling to get by myself. I read about your organization and I thought he would be a perfect candidate for The Time Is Now to Help.

A concerned friend

Dear readers,

I called the concerned friend and we set up a time to meet with her and her friend. She thought it would be best if she was present because he does not take to new people or situations right away, due to the many times he had been harassed and bullied. When we met, I could see he was very nervous. The friend immediately had a calming effect and explained I was there to help.

After a few minutes of talking, the friend explained how they had met. She had been a volunteer at an organization that assisted people with handicaps. She had met her friend there and had helped him to become independent. That was many years ago, but their friendship remained. She has not volunteered for years now that she has so many demands on her time with work, children and her friend. I assured her she was doing a very charitable thing by helping her friend gain independence.

She explained how she helped him to pay his bills monthly by watching him write out his checks and going over everything with him. She said he had been unable to pay the last month’s rent and utilities. He had several unexpected medical problems in the last few months that had taken up almost all his income.

After we talked for a while, he acknowledged I was a friend and was there to help. He leaned toward me and his friend told me he wanted a hug. She was surprised since we had just met. I hugged him, and as I did, I felt and heard him begin to cry. When I looked to his friend she said he had very few friends, and only showed affection after knowing someone for a very long time. She said, “He must sense you are a good person.”

The young man said, “Yes, you are a good person. No one other than my friend ever helps me. Everyone else looks at me like I’m from outer space or ignores me.”

I felt so sad for him. He wanted to be accepted so badly, but not many people gave him a chance. He told me how people immediately look the other way.

In a short period of time I found out how intelligent he really was; he just had difficulties with communicating. We all need to take the time to be patient, kind and compassionate toward those who are dealing with a handicap. They just might need a little more time to communicate.

Since meeting with this compassionate young man, I have networked several people to fill his life with compassion and camaraderie. He is leaning a lot and receiving plenty of hugs. He is so much happier having good friends. He told me the other day, “My life is renewed thanks to my friend introducing me to The Time Is Now. God bless everyone.”

After our review of his financial condition, I knew we needed to help this man keep his independence. We brought his rent up to date and paid his overdue utilities. We also provided his friend with some gas vouchers and some gift certificates for food, since she was doing all the driving for him and helping him with food. She tried to refuse them, but I could see she was very much in need herself. She had been a godsend in his life.

When I spoke to the friend several weeks later, she was happy to report the young man was doing very well. His health and his mental state had greatly improved. She felt he would have no problem remaining independent. She was very grateful for everything The Time Is Now to Help had done to help them.

She felt God had led her to write the letter to us asking for help for her friend. She knew in her heart we would answer, but she never dreamed we would help to the extent we did.

Thank you for sharing and caring.

Health and happiness, God bless everyone, W.C.

A very special thank you to: Richard H. Driehaus Charitable Lead Trust, Johnson Bank, Johnson Insurance, Kikkoman Foods Foundation, Petco Foundation, Lake Geneva Petco, Alliant Energy Foundation, Paper Dolls, Drywall Plus, Trudy Krempel, Martin O’Brien, Aurora Health Care Employee Partnership Campaign, Dan and Maureen Winkler, Margaret Denison, Marvin and Audrey Hersko, Lynn Jeka, Wallie Leitzke, Ron and Carolyn Bloch, W.C. Family Resource Center/Food Pantry volunteers, Michael and Sue Borden, Dick and Jean Honeyager, all of you who support The Time Is Now to Help donation boxes, and the businesses that allow our donation boxes. Anyone who would like a Time Is Now donation box in your business, please call (262) 249-7000.